There's nothing quite like having 7 holes in you to drive someone to coddle you like the baby you are.  Top that with a new haircut, losing 25 pounds post-op and having a 7 month pregnant wife and you can rule the world.  Until you steal the covers one too many times.

I've been feeling bad for Derek since the surgery.  If he wakes up in the middle of the night, he has a really difficult time getting back to sleep.  So I jump up at the sound of The Boy's wimper (ok, most of the time), I sleep with my fat belly hanging off the side of the bed so any sort of movement doesn't awaken him.  If I lost the covers when he rolled over, I just waved goodbye sadly and huddled up for the cold winter night.

Until the other night.  I got up to settle The Boy and when I came back, my husband was sprawled across the entire bed.

K:  Move over.
D:  No.

No?  No?  I climbed into my 6 inches of bed, with no covers and shivered myself to sleep.

I awakened the next morning.

K:  I asked you to move over last night and you didn't.
D:  Really, that doesn't sound like me.

I looked over his side of the bed and saw 2 feet of covers resting on the floor.   And I flipped out.  

K:  You have two feet of covers lying on the floor over there!  I was freezing my ass off last night.  Do you think the hardwood floor enjoyed being warm and toasty last night?  I'm shocked you didn't invite the dog upstairs to sleep on all those covers on the floor.  I ask you to move over and you tell me "no."  You then made your poor pregnant wife nearly freeze to death.
D:  I had surgery?????
K:  Oh, that ship has sailed.  I see you and raise you an "I'm pregnant" with your son.  It is ON now, brotha.
D:  Does this mean that I don't get all the covers anymore?
K:  Oh, were that your biggest problem now....