My son's will be...

"Why are all the tips of my fingers flat?"

How does one answer that one was an idiot and could not operate baby nail clippers?

Derek says that this is not all bad, my permanently marring my son's hands. He says that it will protect him from detection should he choose a life of crime one of these days. You know, no fingerprints.

I hate to point out that scarred fingertips, barring complete obliteration of the whirls and ridges, are actually a great identification source. I am too flabbergasted that a life of crime may be a possible occupation for the offspring that I labored 28 hours to bring into this world.

Maybe he was joking. I really hope he was joking.